Sleep Tight: Our Top Tips for Better Newborn Sleep

Welcome to parenthood! You have just completed the marathon that is birth, your body is beginning its postpartum physical recovery, and you have been handed a tiny, little baby to take care of. And chances are - thanks to that tiny, little baby - you are not sleeping more than 1-2 hours at a time.

If one more well-meaning friend or family member asks you how the baby is sleeping, you are going to lose it!

Take a deep breath. We’re here to remind you that if your baby is waking up every couple of hours to eat or be comforted, that is TOTALLY normal. We’re also here to tell you that those first few weeks are purely SURVIVAL MODE only. There are no bad habits. No bedtime routines. Only survival. Got it?

But as you transition into 3-4 weeks postpartum and beyond, there are some tips and tricks you can implement to build better sleep habits for your baby. And better sleep habits for baby equals better sleep for everyone.

So without further ado, we present you our best newborn sleep tips to get your baby sleeping better throughout the day and night.

Differentiate between daytime and nighttime sleep

You’ve probably heard someone mention how new babies tend to have their days and nights mixed up. It’s true. Unlike adults whose sleep cycles are governed by circadian rhythms, newborn sleep is controlled mostly by their stomachs - when they are hungry, they will wake up and want to eat. But there are things you can do to encourage your new baby to sleep longer at night, rather than in the middle of the day.

During the day:

  • Keep it bright - open the blinds and keep the lights turned on

  • Get some fresh air - even if it’s just briefly, take your baby outside for some sunshine and fresh air

  • Keep noise levels regular - don’t tiptoe around the house during the day or talk only in whispers; daytime is when people talk and play and your baby needs to learn this

During the night:

  • Keep it dark - when changing diapers or feeding your baby, avoid turning on any bright lights and instead use a nightlight or some other low light

  • Keep it quiet - don’t talk to or engage your baby during the night and keep voices quiet; your baby will begin to learn that the middle of the night is not for playing

Create optimal sleep conditions

It’s unrealistic to think your newborn will be able to sleep 10-12 hours straight during those early postpartum weeks. But there are a few things you can implement to encourage your baby to sleep a little bit longer at night.

In our experience, we notice that babies sleep best with:

  • A nice, tight swaddle

  • White noise

  • A dark room

  • A pacifier (if you are introducing one)

Pay attention to wake windows

We are not big fans of trying to schedule your baby’s sleep strictly by the clock - all babies are different and none of them actually read all those expert sleep books anyway. But we do believe that paying attention to developmentally appropriate wake windows - the amount of time babies can happily stay awake - can translate into better sleep for everyone.

For most newborns, expect wake windows anywhere from 45-60 minutes at a time. As babies get closer to 3-4 months of age, this might stretch to more like 60-90 minutes at a time. For young babies, the longer they stay awake past these developmentally appropriate wake windows, the more overstimulated and fussy they will become. The old adage “Sleep Begets Sleep” is certainly true for new babies, so trying to keep them awake more throughout the day will not translate into better sleep at night. In fact, it will probably result in a cranky, overtired baby who has more trouble falling asleep and staying asleep.

Of course, you know your baby best. So don’t stress if your newborn has differing sleep needs - we don’t expect you to watch the clock all day long.

But if you notice early sleep cues - tired and glazed-looking eyes, far-off staring and inability to make eye-contact, red-rimmed eyelids, slower sucking, and quieter or still body movement - it’s probably a great time to get baby settled down for a nap, especially if it is within that developmentally appropriate wake window.

Watch out for that “Big Sleep”

The “Big Sleep” refers to the longest period of sleep a newborn baby will have in a 24-hour period. For most newborns, this can range anywhere from 3-5 hours. So if your baby is only capable of sleeping 3-4 hour stretches at night, rest assured that they are sleeping like a baby!

But make sure your baby doesn’t give you that “Big Sleep” during the middle of the day. If he sleeps from 10am - 2pm, chances are he will not be able to sleep from 10pm - 2am that night.

Please feel free to ignore all those people who tell you to never wake a sleeping baby. Wake that baby up! Especially if your newborn is sleeping 3-4 hour stretches during the day. You want to preserve that long stretch of sleep for nighttime, so instead wake your baby more frequently during the day (every 2-3 hours, especially for a breastfed infant) and feed them. In our experience, the more baby wakes to eat during the day, the better the chances that “Big Sleep” will happen overnight.

And most importantly, try your best not stress about sleep. Remember, nobody knows your baby better than you!

You can read all the sleep books and follow all the sleep experts, but your baby is unique and will fall into their own unique rhythms and patterns. Keep these tips in mind as you get to know your baby and your baby’s sleep needs - use what works and throw out the rest. And don’t forget to call in some backup when you need it - your postpartum doula is here to help ALL of you get more sleep.

Kelly Rutan