I'm Scared I Won't Know When to Go to the Hospital

Sixteen years ago, my husband was speeding down the interstate trying to get me to the birth center. I remember gripping his hand and and yelling at him to go faster and not stop for anything. We had run to get into the car because our daughter was coming SOON. I had my nightgown on and no underwear….I really thought this baby was going to be born in our car. Long story short, I did make it to the birth center and she was born 30 minutes later. But what I wished I had done was head in to the birth center a couple of hours before. I wished I had had someone to tell me that it was time to go.

Here’s the thing about hospitals and birth centers; they typically won’t admit you until you are in active labor. There is usually some time in labor where contractions are spread out a bit and not super intense. This is the time they want you to labor at home. Sometimes, though, people have prodromal labor…where contractions start for a few hours..and then stop. That pattern sometimes repeats itself for a couple of days until the body kicks into true labor. Usually, though, that means active labor will go quickly.

I had had that prodromal labor for a couple of nights before I went into labor. I didn’t ever call my provider to ask about it and I didn’t have a doula to talk to about it. I kinda just ignored it and didn’t think anything more about it when the contractions fizzled out once again. I woke up the next morning and had some light contractions and by that afternoon they were getting a bit more regular and a bit more intense. I still ignored it as it was my husband’s birthday and we were headed out to dinner with lots of his extended family. I had contractions throughout dinner and kinda knew I was in labor at that point but I still hadn’t called my midwife. When I got home from dinner I went to get in the bathtub. That water felt great and I was in the bath for a few hours. At some point I finally called my midwife. Because I could still talk through the contractions she told me to keep laboring at home. Keep in mind she had no idea that I had had prodromal labor a couple of days before this. When I got out of the tub things kinda ramped up and I called her back. She still told me stay at home. For some reason I thought I would just go to sleep. I did lay down and must have dozed off for a few minutes…but I woke up to THE WORLD’S BIGGEST CONTRACTION. I mean that contracion lifted me up out of my bed. I told me husband we had to leave NOW to go to the birth center. I knew we had a 45 minute drive ahead and I was terrified we wouldn’t make it. This time I called the midwife and said we were on the way whether she thought we should head in or not.

I wish I had had someone who could have told me to be prepared to GO QUICKLY to the birth center when things headed towards to active labor. If I had told my midwife about the prodromal labor, she likely would’ve had me come in earlier. If I had had a doula to talk with me when I was laboring at home, she would have told me to head to the birth center as soon as I got out of the bathrub. I did like my midwife and she was a very calm presence during a rapid devliery once I arrived at the birth center. But, she didn’t see me. She didn’t know that I don’t make a ton of noise during contractions. She didn’t know that I could make myself talk through just about every active labor contraction. I needed someone by my side in real time when I was still at home. A doula would have known the signs in me of a quickly approaching active labor and transition combined with the fact that this was my second baby…a recipe for a fast active labor and delivery!